bereft

I woke at 4.20am, which at least means I will get where I am going today safely.

I woke and thought about how, in the time after leaving the churchwarden and reporting him, I was bereft, because losing my 'adoptive family', wasn't nothing, it was a huge blow, and I still wanted to be a 'daughter' and 'belong' somewhere, although the churchwarden's wife had made it clear I never 'belonged' there.

I remember how she did things like telling me how her sons would never do the kind of work I did, even when they were students.
It's always nice to be belittled.
Not.