29/05/2017 CC Tilby, Butler, SCIE, IICSA, Murray, Venables
Dear Graham Tilby,
I am writing again regarding my extreme concern over the Church of England's very poor, indeed non-existent, safeguarding, and the harm to me which you seem unable to address. I do not feel that I have a future or will survive or want to survive what I have experienced and I am suffering, but I would like to see things change before I die. I would also like, and have asked, for the Church of England to pay for my attendance at Dignitas to make my suffering shorter as I have been publicly and utterly destroyed by the Church's terrible safeguarding stunt gone wrong, the Jersey and Winchester whitewash.
You allowed me to be publicly destroyed, and incredibly tried to tell me that this was none of your business and you had no control over it. Allowing a vulnerable adult to be driven to suicide by public discrediting and smears is your business, it is a safeguarding issue, and if you didn't understand that, then you should have realised this and resigned, not gone on badgering me for a meeting as you do with vulnerable people - this is a grave concern of mine, instead of safeguarding, your job and your colleague's job is to force meetings on unwitting vulnerable people, making them feel that they are being listened to and something will be done, to meet Church targets and legislation and insurance needs rather than any care or concern.
This is wrong, especially if you badger someone into a meeting as you tried to with me, with all those emails full of fake warmth and sympathy for show after allowing and aiding my public discrediting. You have psychologically injured me and when you didn't get your meeting and I continued to complain about the open and glaring safeguarding failure of me being publicly destroyed and discredited, you battened down the hatches and have refused to act upon the massive safeguarding failure of which you were part and condoned.
I am speaking up for the voiceless vulnerable and not just me, I don't know how many vulnerable people have been bullied into meetings to close their complaints down and meet insurance needs but it must stop, and you must address my case as I have been left suffering and knowing that you and Moira Murray condone my suffering and uphold the wrongdoers in my case, who all still have access to the vulnerable and pose a risk to them and have not been dealt with,
I know from the things that you said on the phone that you did not know what had happened to me and you were not interested, you upheld Gladwin and his upholding of the Jersey Deanery with the help of a conflicted Jersey advocate, you upheld Elaine Rose's illegal interference in the whitewash Jersey Safeguarding Partnership report that was set up between Jane Fisher and the police as part of the mutual absolving of wrong partnership that they had been running since 2008, and you tried to excuse what had happened to me in being publicly destroyed instead of addressing it. Not good safeguarding.
You didn't get your meeting as you and Jane Dodds were unable to explain why you so urgently needed to meet me or why it was 'for my welfare' when you had watched and even taken part as I was publicly destroyed, after ignoring my anguished pleas for help for seven months and only contacting me during my public destruction by the Church, and for their sake and not mine, to tick boxes and close the matter down.
The Church of England do not safeguard, and while you have been part of this atrocity and have decided to stay in your positions while ignoring my distress because you were 'advised' to, thus further branding and shaming me, the Church of England can't safeguard. No matter what denials and condonement of wrongdoers you have made, the fact that you are still in your positions and refusing to respond properly to my distress and leaving me carrying the burden of the Church's wrongdoing, you are not safeguarding, you are covering up, you are condoning horrifying misconduct by senior clergy such as the Archbishop and Bishops, and while you do that, nothing has changed in Church of England safeguarding. And you should be ashamed of yourself for being part of this and leaving me falling under the intolerable weight of injustice and the blame for all of the wrongdoing that I have suffered and reacted to.
The whole of my adult life has been affected by abuse and prejudice in the Church of England and the most appalling lack of safeguarding possible, for which I have been made to blame. And for more than a year you have, by your actions and attitude to me, rammed that blame down my throat, you have taken advice from wrongdoers with the Church's interests at heart and not mine, and have made my suffering worse, as did your colleage Jane Dodds, who before she finished moonlighting as safeguarding caseworker for the Church of England and returned to her real job, inflicted the worst distress possible on me by upholding the church of england and their wrongdoing to me, excusing them and telling me that she and you 'wanted to make my life how it was before'. I cry when I remember such an awful crass thing being said to me after I had been unhealably destroyed.
And then after you and Dodds had finished chewing me up, upholding the harm to me and trying to badger me into a meeting, you didn't get what you wanted so instead of calling an independent inquiry - which you did discuss in order to try to get me into that meeting that you badger alleged victims into - you decided you would do nothing and leave me destroyed and suffering unhealably, you decided to ignore my calls and letters asking for my case to be referred outside the Church to an independent agency who would not be biased as you were against me on advice given to you and a one-sided Church of England version of my case. You and Jane Dodd's replacement have ignored my distress and in the case of Moira Murray, Jane's replacement, putting the phone down on me is the solution.
There is no safeguarding in the Church of England and you and Dodds and Murray failed me and refused to refer my case outside of the church once you decided you wouldn't engage with me as you would not get your meeting. To make things worse, despite you knowing (or not knowing the true picture) of the police being used against me persistently and one-sidedly by the church to try to silence me, doing lasting damage, I have had the police on my doorstep ruining my life, another part of the new safeguarding failure routine, hound the church's victims with unsolicited and harmful efforts by the police to try to get victim statements, the same police who beat and imprisoned me for the church for years.
I am not accepting the church trying to force me to be a sexual abuse victim and not a victim of very severe and enduring misconduct of which you have been part, condoned, upheld and excused, leading to lasting damage to me. My distress and pain will never be gone, and I have asked the Church who have destroyed me beyond healing to pay for my attendance at Dignitas, it would be the first humane treatment they have ever offered me if and when they agree. You haven't safeguarded me, you have failed me on the advice of misadvisers and a 'case file' that you boasted that doesn't include my story and you have upheld wrongdoers at my expense. You should step down, what happens to the voiceless vulnerable?
I believe that SCIE should make a freedom of information request, as should I, and look at that 'case file' and both they and I are entitled to copies of all the whitewash reports into my case. Unless the Church willingly provides those reports, something is very wrong with Church of England Safeguarding. Well something is very wrong with Church of England Safeguarding, but Paul Butler and Justin Welby, with no conscience or remorse for destroying me and leaving dangerous people such as Bob and Daphne Key in positions where they can access the vulnerable, intend to go on using safeguarding as a falsehood and a vainglorious boast for the Church of England in the public spotlight.
Bob and Daphne Key and other people involved in the harm to me remain a risk to the vulnerable and that is the clearest indication possible of your bias and unwillingness to safeguarding properly because you uphold and endorse harm to me and blame me, as you did in everything you and Jane Dodds did and said regarding the matter. You have behaved atrociously in pushing the blame onto me after failing to even contact me until asked to do so by the people who had harmed me, for their benefit.
It was clear that you didn't want to meet me to take my account of things or act upon it, as you would have already been acting swiftly against the wrongdoers had you been in any way willing to act, and one meeting would not resolve anything. I am horrified that you have tried to badger me into the meeting that you badger and bully vulnerable survivors into, without doing anything about the harm to me, and ignoring my cries for help before you contacted me on behalf of the wrongdoers, you wanted to meet me for the Church's benefit and not mine, and when I challenged you and your open repeating back to me of the mis-advice you had been given about how to respond to my distress when you provoked it with your crass mishandling of your part in the cover-up, you dropped me like hot coals. You horrify me, you have played a part in destroying me, you have upheld wrongdoers and you appear to think that this is acceptable and that the Church are protected while I will suffer until I die. Apparently, to you, that is safeguarding.
Would you please do as asked for a year and refer my case to a safeguarding body outside of the Church of England, make sure that they contact me instead of whitewashing my case over again, and then it really will be best if you and Moira Murray take stock of your terrible attitude to me and the damage you have done in protecting the wrongdoers in my case and upholding them while I have been publicly destroyed, and you should both step down and go to jobs where you will not be insulting victims by blaming them and their distress and upholding wrongdoers.
And don't forget the request for me to attend Dignitas. If you really think that I am worse than abusers or Bishops and Deans who destroy the vulnerable, if you really think that I should go on carrying the vicious branding that the Church have inflicted on me through police, press and other authorities, I don't want to live. I don't want to live in a world where people like you uphold evil from an organization which still stupidly and emptily uses the Name of Jesus' for limitless abuse of power and destruction of the vulnerable.
I don't want to live enduring Justin Welby's lies in the press and media when my destruction is the reason he shouldn't be there to lie any more, but no authority stands up to the corrupt and Godless Church of England, you are even having a fake safeguarding audit done, one in which my case is carefully airbrushed out, lied about, so that the Child abuse inquiry's strategic delay for Welby's sake can be used for the PR campaign over the fake audit presumably.
I don't want to live in the same world as the church of england and their use of the word 'safeguarding' to mean self-glorification and cover up, while I suffer and suffer with no relief and no way that there very can be relief because you uphold what has happened to me, you condone it, and you blame and shame me for my distress.
Let me know when you are willing to deal with the wrongdoers and abusers in my case and take away the burden of shame and branding that I carry. Let me know when you and Moira Murray are willing to fulfil your title and record my story and redact the public discrediting of me by the Archbishop and Bishops and apologize for your failure to contact me until they demanded it on their behalf. Let me know when you stop taking mis-advice that puts the blame on me and when you are willing to record my side of things. If you can't do any of this, step down because you are not safeguarding, you are taking part in harm and abuse of a vulnerable adult. Probably more than one.
Finally, remember to 'advise' your church that reaction to sustained harm by the Church is not a 'mental illness' whereby the victim can be discredited. Advise yourself this as well.
JJ/HG - Victim of the massive Jersey and Winchester safeguarding stunt, smear campaign, whitewash and discrediting