Saturday 17 May 2014

The silenced

Just think, what happens to all those victims in the church who do not go on fighting to be heard?
What happens to the silenced?
To those who see and hear the church's dishonest headlines that invalidate them.
Those who commit suicide and are slurred as 'mentally ill' when in reality they are damaged by abuse.
Those who know that if they speak they will not be heard, believed, treated reasonably.
Those who the Church scapegoat.
Those who cannot speak up, which is most vulnerable people.

Thursday 15 May 2014

http://freespeechoffshore.nl/stuartsyvretblog/2009/07/

JM email

From: *********@downsbenefice.org.uk
To: *********@hotmail.co.uk
Date: Fri, 18 Sep 2009 02:20:58 -0700
Subject: RE: for (JM) only
Der ******
I have not replied before because you have always said any email would be deleted unread, so I just stopped trying.
I have been very sad about all that has happened, and I too have dreamed, of seeing you again and laughing and talking in our old way.
I have never stopped loving you, and I fear for you.
Do not worry about me, I am OK, and about to go away tomorrow with Annie and Mum for a fortnight.
I don’t have time to write more now, but if you want me to I will reply to future emails.
Love,
(JM)
Revd (JM)
Please note my new e-mail address with immediate effect is ***********@downsbenefice.org.uk

From: ***** ****** [mailto:*********@hotmail.co.uk] 
Sent: 18 September 2009 04:59
To: Revd (JM)
Subject: for (JM) only
Hello (JM),

I doubt that you read this, if it even gets through, the administrator reads it and deletes it.

I just had a dream, that we were friends again, it was wonderful, we walked arm in arm, I was no longer desperate outlaw being hounded for what I reported.

our friendship was full of happiness and laughter and no memory of what happened.

Then we saw a tornado approaching us, you did not seem to understand it was dangerous, I got you to run with me and I was shielding you with my body, because you were more precious to me than anything ever, and you were in real life before you betrayed me, and I would have sheltered you and given my life for you, I still would. In the dream the tornado was too close, and I tried to get you to 'the house' whatever house, and shielded you as the tornado hit.

I hope no tornado hits you.

I wish I could shield you.

I wish you were my dear friend,

and not part of me being dehumanised for reporting grave wrongs.

you shouldn't have acted for the people who hurt me,


or been involved, because it was against my wishes,

nor did I report you, I would not make a complaint against you, even though you gave people the wrong image of me,

and stood and let your family attack me when I was desparate for help because of the very people who you mediated for and got involved for and spoke for when you shouldn't.

it was the people you spoke for who caused your name or yor husband's name to be mentioned.

but I hope you never have to deal with any consequences,

I have never wanted a tornado to hit you, no matter how you have unintentionally hurt me,

I do not think that you can possibly know from where you are, how seriously I have been damaged by what has happened,

and I doubt that the people who communicated with you because they wanted things hushed up would have told you.

but I am not mad nor criminal, I have only tried to protect others because I have been destroyed.


I hope no tornado ever hits you, I would give my life to shield you, as I tried to in my dream.


you didnt shield me, but that doesn't matter, we are apart now. I loved you so much in the dream, and in real life I did, you were my friend, but I am me now. I couldnt be your me, I am my me, and I am also the me that those people tell people I am, because their influence is also very strong, even though I am not who they say I am.


I hope you are safe forever because it would break my heart if you were not.

*****

A short note to the Bishop

if you release the Bailhache report you will kill me, 
it is as simple as that, you wicked man.
It is sick of you to be spouting rubbish about trying to make the bailhache report less distressing, it will kill me,
you have spent 14 months on my constructive, slow, torturous murder,
and you pretend to care that the final blow will distress me?

What happened to Christianity, that my being branded for life by police and authorities wasn't enough as it is with rapists, murderers, deliberate crooks and wife beaters, who do not usually get the privilage of a Bishop and Diocese spending six years branding them and driving them from sociaty and 14 months of publicly being flogged before being murdered by a report done agains them by their abusers' supporters?

It took everylast atom of strength and belief in myself to rebuild my life and in your recent media attacks and your forthcoming murder of me, you have left me as I was when I was left destitute and in my pyjamas in 2010,
there was basically no point in rebuilding and so I will return to sleeping rough in the run up to your murder of me.

Basically, when I returned to Hampshire in my pyjamas and with no bra, after being thrown from my home in Jersey, I did not know that I could expect another year of public whipping from fisher and scott-joynt as well as police brutality and detentions and branding for life for standing up to them,
which you noticable did not make any sort of investigation into.

I know that even if I was to survive the bailhache report, which will kill me, and I wont survive it, 
I will not be free of you, just as Jane Fisher was not publicly satisfied with leaving me destitute in my pyjamas, the same again will not satisfy you, you will continue to destroy me after the Steel report.
So basically I will spend my last nights where I am happiest and least likely to be violently dragged from my home, beaten, robbed, locked in and jeered at and beaten.
I am now homeless again.

Wednesday 14 May 2014

As I am led away to be crucified, whatever happened to Polo denying me three times before the clock crowed?

http://photopol.blogspot.co.uk/2014/05/move-along-now.html

http://bobhilljersey.blogspot.co.uk/2014/05/jerseys-dean-steel-report-fit-for-waste.html

Imagination

Lets pretend we are the Archbishop's office and the press actually ask that man what is going on with my blog posts and the 'safeguarding investigation'.

This is the kind of statement you would get in reply:

The Archbishop is very concerned about the vulnerable individual involved 
(no he isn't)

The Archbishop wants the individual to seek help
 (The Church's actions have disrupted the help I was receiving).

The Church have been bombarded with email contact from the individual 
(This is because they have destroyed her for 14 months without once relating to her as a human being, forced into her life and publicly floged her in the press and she can't use a phone properly due to dysphasia).

The Church have offered the individual help (no, they made an illegal and forcible referral without her consent to an irrelevant charity who could offer her nothing and they did not take into account the help she was already receiving, which their actions were disrupting)

The Archbishop has concerns for the individual's mental health 

(well so he should, considering the harm his church has done in the last 14 months, but if his 'mentally ill' daughter who he parades in the paper was publicly flogged  and discreditedfor her depression in an abuse investigation by an organization like the CofE, would he put up with it then?)

And so on, when will the CofE come to terms with the fact that their damaging press-speak does not match reality?!

This same man is having me destroyed

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/religion/9919405/Archbishop-of-Canterbury-offers-personal-apology-to-victim-over-abuse-claims.html

prejudice

Justin Welby showing off in a nothing campaign about preventing homophobic bullying in schools.

Justin Welby's church is one of the most prejudiced, bigoted and narrow-minded organizations in the world.

They decided to brand me as seriously mentally ill for my distress and have got me a record for it and had me publicly flogged.

So why doesn't he stop the self-glorification mission and look at what his own church are doing and do something effective about it?

He could always start with an anti-homophobic bullying campaign in his churches!


14 months of being publicly whipped

Because of the Bishop of Winchester's foolhardy and harmful actions, which the Archbishop incomprehensibly condones, I have suffered 14 months of having my soul destroyed and having hatred directed at me by complete strangers.
The Archbishop praises the Bishop for this, apparently thus stating that publicly destroying an abuse survivor and subjecting her to public humiliation, hatred and smears, from people who have never met her is ok.

And, considering that the Diocese consider me to be 'mentally ill' don't you think it is horrifying that they would allow this? And that the Archbishop would condone this public whipping of someone supposedly ill.

I am ill now, with the stress of 14 months of public destroyal.

I have asked the Archbishop, the Diocese, Safeguarding, the NAS, clergy abuse charities, anyone I could think of, to bring this to an end, but I have been ignored.

It is interesting that the police were prepared to brutalize me and choke me and fling me in a cell in 2011 for my distressed reaction to the diocese violating me, but here in 2014, as I continue as I did then to beg to be left alone, the police refuse to protect me, so my distressed reaction continues, leading to me being further brutalized and detained?

When is someone going to step in and end this?

destroying me through reports

So far in all this sadistic public destroyal of me, no investigation has been done into my complaints, no investigation has been done that interviews me and no investigation has been done that is a safeguarding enquiry, so far only two reports that omit my side of things and did not interview have been done, that destroy me and have left me publicly humiliated and flogged, my soul destroyed and sickened.

I do not understand how an oganization as big as the Church of England could get away with continuing to destroy me this way and no one will stop them, even though I am suffering mental anguish night and day and knowing I am powerless to stop this organization which has relentlessly destroyed me for six years.

How can anyone know the truth of what has happened through reports that claim to be about my side of things and yet omit me?
Why must I wait to inevitably be killed by the second and worse report against me by the organization which has destroyed me?
Why must I wait to again be spat on and derided by people with no understanding, strangers, because of reports that omit my sided of things and yet claim to be about safeguarding, who is being safeguarded when the reports are hijacked and smear campaigns are run against me?

Do the Church of England really not understand the severe and lifelong damage done to me by the inaccurate Korris report and the fact that the Steel report, done against me by a comflicted judge who volunteered in order to clear the Dean and damn me, will kill me?
Does the Church of England not understand the depth and severity of damage done to me and how I cannot go on waiting in severe mental anguish for the day they kill me with the Steel report?
Do the Church of England care?
No, they are cold, remorseless, soulless, relentless and would obviously be very happy that they are inflicting cruelty on me and will kill me, and no-one will stop them or defend me.

This matter has never been about me, my complaint or what has happened to me, because it has always omitted me and my side of things, what it was about and is about is a mystery, but it has had the side effect of destroying me.




Tuesday 13 May 2014

Plea

Unless the Steel (Bailhache) report, watered down and tampered with as it now is, is stopped, then I will be dead, I did not survive intact from being spat on and villified by total strangers when the Korris rubbish was published, and 14 months of constant injury has left me very tired and ill.
Please, save my life.

Essential reading

http://bobhilljersey.blogspot.com/2014/05/jerseys-dean-archbishop-of-canterbury.html

- read the first few comments in response to Bob's blog.

http://whatreallyhappenedinthechurch.blogspot.co.uk/2014/01/waiting.html#.U3KEboFdXJk

http://whatreallyhappenedinthechurch.blogspot.co.uk/2013/11/formal-letter-of-warning-to-bishop-tim.html#.U3KDxoFdXJk

http://whatreallyhappenedinthechurch.blogspot.co.uk/2014/05/safeguarding-investigation.html#.U3KEQoFdXJk

http://whatreallyhappenedinthechurch.blogspot.co.uk/2014/05/email-letter-to-archbishop-11052011-3.html#.U3KEEoFdXJk

http://whatreallyhappenedinthechurch.blogspot.co.uk/2014/03/social-services-birthdays-and-whats.html#.U3KD6oFdXJk

http://whatreallyhappenedinthechurch.blogspot.co.uk/2014/05/formal-legal-letter-to-archbishop-of.html#.U3KE04FdXJk

http://whatreallyhappenedinthechurch.blogspot.co.uk/2014/05/statement-about-archbishops-interview.html#.U3KFE4FdXJk

http://whatreallyhappenedinthechurch.blogspot.co.uk/2014/01/the-letter-to-jersey-deanery-as.html#.U3KFfoFdXJk

http://whatreallyhappenedinthechurch.blogspot.co.uk/2013/11/the-endless-horror-of-cover-ups-and.html#.U3KFw4FdXJk

http://whatreallyhappenedinthechurch.blogspot.co.uk/p/statement-from-last-summer.html#.U3KF7IFdXJk

http://whatreallyhappenedinthechurch.blogspot.co.uk/2013/11/for-limited-time-only-here-is-my.html#.U3KMtoFdXJk

The Bishop and Archbishop have been sent the concerns listed on this blog repeatedly and are not interested, neither will the police or any other person or organization stop this relentless damage to me.
Bob Hill has worked hard to represent me, but he doesn't know my full story, and I haven't even been able to produce the full story on this blog because of trauma, but one thing I know is that once the Steel report is internationally published to damn me, that will be the end of it, that will be all the public hears and hatred against me as happened with the Korris report, will continue, and I am too weak and ill to withstand it.
No other abuse survivor in history has been as publicly and thoroughly punished for reporting abuse as I have been by the Church of England.


Safeguarding investigation?

How can it be a Safeguarding investigation when:


  • The Bishop causes maximum distress and damage by forcibly and illegally  tracing the autistic survivor through the police and leaving her feeling violated.
  • An inaccurate report that omits the survivors views is published internationally, causing the survivor maximum distress and requests by the survivor to have that defamatory and incorrect report removed are ignored.
  • The Survivor is subject to a public and media hate campaign by supporters of the wrongdoers, the Bishop does nothing, preferring to hide behind a PR company who make him look all the more silly and do nothing to help the conflict, in the meantime his safeguarding officer who in the past caused severe psychological injury to the survivor, is allowed to continue to illegally liase with the police about her. The survivor is left desparate and distressed, as in previous years, allowing the church to back up their 'insane' label of her that they have worked hard with police and mental health services to try and get her.
  • The Bishop threatens the victim when she pleads for the violations of her life to stop and not re-start.
  • The Bishop launches a conflicted investigation headed by a 'volunteer' who came forward because she is close to political and judiciary supporters of the wrongdoers.
  • The Bishop re-instates the person suspended as a result of the report and says he 'acted in good faith' basically saying the investigation is over. He does not pass on the aimless and directionless forced 'apology' from the same person. He instead sends a message reading 'no unsolicited intervention-confirmed' to the victim.
  • And a few months later, the Bishop's safeguarding office, who has a formal complaint against her for repeated violations of the survivor's rights and privacy, intervenes unsolicited by illegally and without consent, referring the survivor to the NSPCC, to a colleague of hers. Bearing in mind that the survivor is now 33 and despises the NSPCC, this is absolutely appalling. 
  • The Bishop tries to personally force this referral on the survivor, ignoring the fact that he has been asked to only contact the survivor's mediator, due to the damage inflicted by the Bishop so far.
  • The survivor writes a legal letter to the Bishop, asking him to refrain.
  • The Bishop releases a statement about having had legal representation to stop the conflicted report, and refers to the victim as 'lost last and least' and he prays she will accept the 'support that his staff have been working hard across the diocese to provide' ie his bullying safeguarding officer who has a formal compaint against her by the survivor has made an illegal referral to the NSPCC.
  • The Survivor responds by a press release saying she is not interested in forced support from the Diocese who have destroyed her. The Diocese even at this stage are more interested in image and cover up than the victims's circumstances and feelings and refused at any point to acknowledge the survivor's own pastoral care and therapy situation, which their dreadful behaviour was disrupting.
  • Deathly silence reigns, with the Bishop no longer threatening the victim.
  • The Deanery and Diocese in the catastrophic investigation part company and the Deanery comes under the jurisdiction of  a Bishop who was seen to join in the abusive and damaging games in the churches in the deanery in years previous, and also the Archbishop.
  • The Archbishop causes distress to the survivor by doing an aimless interview in which he seems to have no understanding of the circumstances and praises and condones both the wrongdoer and the Bishop who has done so much damage.
  • The Survivor responds, and is ignored, as usual, disregarded by the Church as mad and bad, much as Jesus was by the Pharisees.
  • The survivor is by now, 14 months after this sick and twisted charade started, quite unwell and waiting every day to be further damaged.

Monday 12 May 2014

Simple comment for the Archbishop

If you praise the wrongdoers in an investigation, then the investigation is not valid and you are condoning their behaviour.
Thus you have invalidated an investigation which seemed to have the only aim of publicly, physically and permenantly injuring me.

A lightbulb appeared!/chancel liability tax

I just realised something about the posts on Planet Jersey.
I am slow on the uptake, excuse me.

The Church comissioners selling millions of pounds of property?

The Church forcing bystanders to pay for repairs to local churches?

Either they are a sick organization or they are in danger of bankrupcy,

either way, non-believers and non-attenders should not be forced on to pay anything.

And if the CofE are in financial difficulties, then I would be delighted to see the Jersey charade waste more money to help see the CofE bankrupt and  castrated. For the sake of the poor, vulnerable, disabled and everyone they have ruined over the years, especially that farming couple left homeless and without their livelihood because of chancel liability tax.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/property/propertynews/9438425/Thousands-of-families-could-be-caught-by-church-repair-bills-as-archaic-rights-revived.html


http://radiac.net/personal/diary/2010/9/id-1301/

http://www.chancelrepair.org/2.html

http://www.worcesternews.co.uk/news/10734565.Hundreds_of_Worcester_homes_to_escape_tax_for_church_repairs/?ref=rc

http://www.eveshamjournal.co.uk/news/10853201.MP_wins_tussle_over_church_tax/

The Church of England are not taking this money to feed the poor, but to feed themselves, or keep buildings that are being used less and less and don't have full congregations, alive.

Sunday 11 May 2014

A prayer from the Heart

Dear Lord and Father,

I am sorry for my sins, especially those that cause the Church of England to continue to destroy me even though I go to confession and do not dwell on the past as the Church of England do.

I ask to be released from living in fear and under oppression from the Church of England and their reports and interviews and press releases, I pray that You will open their eyes to the needless damage they are doing before it is too late, I ask to live the remainder of my life in peace, freed from the Church of England and their powerful destruction of me and my life, I pray earnestly in Jesus' Name that Archbishop Wonga will listen to my pleas and act, not to further destroy me, but to withdraw his Church from harming me.

Lord, please help Archbishop Wonga to understand that he shouldn't encourage wrongdoing by praising wrongdoers in radio interviews, and that if he praises wrongdoers, his investigation is even less valid than before and is causing needless harm to me for no reason and he is validating the wrongdoers to do the same again, so Tim Dakin will be free to destroy and threaten other abuse survivors.
I pray that the people in the Church of England who have run this one-sided campaign against me, with reports and interviews that omit me, are called to account and come to understand that they are doing wrong.

Lord and Father, I ask that from today on, and in Jesus' Name, I am protected from the Church of England and any further attempts by them are exposed and they are called to account.
I pray protection and safety eternally for me, from the Church of England and their associates, employees, volunteers. In Jesus' Name, amen.

I pray that all the nasty slanderous and abusive bystanders who have condemned me on merit of what they have 'heard' from the Korris rubbish and the hate campaign led by Philip Bailhache, Gavin Ashenden and others, repent and see how wrong it is to condemn what you don't understand and when you don't see the full picture.

Thank You God for my life here, it is indeed better than the life I had in Jersey and before, although the wounds I carry are great and life limiting now, I pray in Jesus' Name that I am released from the bondage of the Church of England and left here to live the remainder of my life in peace and quietness, as, if the Church of England were not wounding me, all I would be doing would be enjoying this peaceful and balanced life that I have built.
I pray for protection from the Church of England and for them to cease their terrible twisted charade and see the error of their ways.

In Jesus' Name, Amen.

The Sabbath - Narrow legalism

I have a feeling that the legalistic idiots in the CofE would be screaming about me doing my housework on Sunday, er, yes, I went through all this with Jill Lihou, who was an expert at narrow legalism.

Apparently because the 10 commandments say 'Keep the Sabbath day Holy', I am not supposed to do anything on Sunday.

Yeah, I remember Jill Lihou criticizing me for working on a Sunday, I asked her how I was supposed to earn my living if that was when my employers had shifts for me? And what about emergency services, and why was the Vicar breaking the Sabbath by working?

The answer was 'Oh well, if people have to!'.
So some people have to break the Sabbath?
It needled me, back when I was young and dependent and immature and since, I was indeed, despite being a questioner, a sheeple, who let these old and narrow people control me. And sadly, many vulnerable people are both led astray and away from God by the CofE's legalistic teachings and become part of this legalism that is set against Jesus' teaching.

But here we go.

The Pharisees inflicted this same legalism on Jesus and His Disciples 2000 years ago and still the old legalistic control freaks in the Church of England prefer to abuse the 10 Commandments to suit themselves and control others.
The Church of England appear not to know or understand Matthew Chapter 12. Verses 1 to 8. And onwards. The rest of the chapter.

http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Matthew%2012&version=NIV

So, I know, better than poor Jill, who needed to be in control because she was ill and because she was assaulted in her past,(she told me), that I am not committing wrong by doing my housework today and I needn't feel guilty and expect to go to hell or have displeased my Lord, He is not that fussy!

Because where does 'Keep the Sabbath Day Holy' Translate to don't work?
Jesus said 'needs must', there are more important things in life than legalism.
And old narrow church people 'keeping the Sabbath' blindly, while slating others, are committing that Sin of Judgement, legalism, controlling.

And finally, every member of the CofE would be breaking 'Keep the Sabbath Holy' if it was really about not working, because the Sabbath, in My Father's land and tongue, is not Sunday, but Saturday.
Shabbat.

God rested on the 7th Day, Shabbat, not Yom Rishon.
And He does approve of us resting.

Keep reading the Book of Matthew, it is indeed about the same dreadful Pharisees who, 2000 years later are trying to destroy another person who spoke out against them, the Church of England.

I wonder how they would like it?

I wonder how the Bishop, Archbishop or any of their staff would like it if someone or an organization burst into their lives, defaming and threatening them, and then without their consent tried to refer them for 'help'?

They wouldn't like or agree with it, but they are powerful people in a powerful Godless organization, and they would deal with it legally, whereas I am a destroyed vulnerable person who has been defenceless against this rape-like forcing and violation of my human rights.

Trying to explain to wealthy and powerful old men in the church of england the damage they are doing is really hard, because they have no idea and basically don't care, what things are like from the point of view of a poor and vulnerable person such as myself or Jesus.